Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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