Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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