I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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