Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
