I'm jealous of your bromance
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
