They should really pass out barf bags in church
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize