Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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