Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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