i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
