dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
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He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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