okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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