Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
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