I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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