I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He keeps bees of course he's weird
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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