You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
