So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
I'm going to Hell for sure
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode