Texts From Last Night

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  (434): View more from Virginia

  well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard

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  (434): well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard http://tfl.nu/45qa
  Replies (10) Good night (3103) Bad night (1074)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work

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  (719): I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work http://tfl.nu/axgl
  Replies (14) Good night (3618) Bad night (849)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me

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  (781): just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me http://tfl.nu/gh9y
  Replies (12) Good night (933) Bad night (4044)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.

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  (973): so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning. http://tfl.nu/luil
  Replies (65) Good night (1314) Bad night (6859)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry

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  (602): shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry http://tfl.nu/ty7k
  Replies (16) Good night (7912) Bad night (948)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.

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  (702): sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick. http://tfl.nu/022f
  Replies (14) Good night (931) Bad night (4442)
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  (619): View more from California

  Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex

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  (619): Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex http://tfl.nu/ckpn
  Replies (15) Good night (3349) Bad night (1102)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow

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  (908): almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow http://tfl.nu/cscz
  Replies (13) Good night (4531) Bad night (877)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.

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  (815): He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background. http://tfl.nu/8wbf
  Replies (5) Good night (594) Bad night (1739)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.

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  (541): Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues. http://tfl.nu/gw56
  Replies (9) Good night (785) Bad night (2012)
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  (714): View more from California

  Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made

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  (714): Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made http://tfl.nu/j4f1
  Replies (7) Good night (1712) Bad night (475)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.

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  (207): I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered. http://tfl.nu/1qcp
  Replies (3) Good night (576) Bad night (715)
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  (707): View more from California

  The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".

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  (707): The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny". http://tfl.nu/ox7j
  Replies (3) Good night (516) Bad night (558)
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  (415): View more from California

  Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.

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  (415): Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time. http://tfl.nu/jw47
  Replies (0) Good night (542) Bad night (226)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag

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  (309): My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag http://tfl.nu/a60b
  Replies (2) Good night (150) Bad night (346)

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