You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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