just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
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i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
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Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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