Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
