if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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