We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Blood and glitter go together right?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
