Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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