college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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