He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
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I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
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