also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
