Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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