a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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