Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
