goodnight i made you a song goodbye
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
