I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
