hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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