literally had 100 drinks last night.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
