Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Pants are for mortals
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Randomize
