Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
