im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
