I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
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I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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