It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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