Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize