Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
