is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
