Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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