woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I could fuck to npr.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
