I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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