I want to walk on stilts...naked
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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