She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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