woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
