Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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