Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
