so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
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i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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