Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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