i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
